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Some of my happiest childhood memories include Spam. My mother worked part-time balancing the checkbook for a local mother of 12, and we were over at their house a lot. Spam was one of the few foods the younger kids could handle cooking, so there were lots of Spam sandwiches cooked up and enjoyed in their massive, rambling kitchen.
I had a geometry teacher in high school who, when told "I know the answer!" would finish in song, "For the world today?" (those who don't know the song won't get it, I guess). But yeah, if I thought Jesus were a real thing, I probably wouldn't ask him about midget porn, or hooker perfume.
The funny thing is, I had a suspicious spot on the "screening" mammogram, so they ordered a "diagnostic" mammo. They paid for the diagnostic, no problem, but I wouldn't have even known I needed it if not for the screening mammo. I think the rule was no screening mammos under age 35. I have been getting them since around age 30, because my mom was 35 when she was diagnosed. For women with a close family history, they actually recommend you start getting mammograms 10 years years earlier than the onset for your relative - so I was actually late in starting mine.